Sunday, January 22, 2017

Resilience

Yesterday morning, as I was driving home from doing a brisk, predawn walk on campus with my friend Captain Tara, a deer bounded from the left side of the road right into the driver's side of my car, just a few feet away from home. I slammed on the brakes, screamed DAMMIT WHAT THE FUCK, and then caught a glimpse of the deer looking straight at me with its pointy ears and big brown eyes, like EXCUSE ME MISS! He/she bounded away out of sight before I could catch my breath and continue driving the last few feet to my driveway.

When I got home, I opened my car door to major creaking and squeaking. The side of the door featured blood and a little bit of fur. I was a little traumatized for a second. There was also a dent near the wheel housing.

I went through a range of emotions: unnerved that a random deer decided that at that moment it would bound across the street; anger at myself for not seeing the deer in enough time to come to a complete stop; foreboding--did this mean my entire day of carefully planned events was doomed? Was this a sign of things to come?; and annoyance--now I would have to deal with a body repair that was certain to cost an arm and leg.

I examined the car and there appeared to be no major damage except the inconvenient dent that caused my door the inability to open fully. I looked at my cellphone clock and told myself, well I'm ok, the deer seems okay (it did run away, didn't it?), and I have got to get going. I've got a big day ahead of me and I MUST not let this ruin what is going to be awesome. After cleaning the blood and fur off the car with the garden hose I headed inside to prepare for a full day. I knew that I needed to be resilient, clean up what I could and get on with my life. I couldn't let myself mope about the deer or my car or the impeding doom that was apparently going to be happening. I got on with it.

This time of month, this third weekend in January happens to be around the time when everyone tells you that the novelty of your new years resolutions will wear off, and that you'll fall back into old habits. This is also the time of winter when people can become depressed and anxious and it's fairly
easy to dig yourself into an emotional hole if you haven't already reached all of your resolution goals.

So I have a challenge for you, particularly if you happen to be someone in this position.


Start again. The deer will be ok. You will be ok after a little crash or interruption in your grand plans. Start again. Got a little dent? Can you still drive your car? Sure it ain't pretty, but if you can still drive it, I say it's a win. Practice being resilient, especially now. You might think that starting over isn't worth it but I swear to you that it is. Your mental and physical health are worth it. You are worth it. Rejoice in your ability to do something, even if it's square one yet again.

Did you make a resolution to go to run couple of times a week? Start again. Only now, be realistic about how many times you'll actually run THIS WEEK. Once? Okay, start there. That's okay. We don't have to be rockstars all the time. Let's focus on being rockstars some of the time first.

Did you make a resolution or goal to eat more healthfully and without realizing it head right back into wherever you were? Ok. Don't hate yourself. Start again. Master one meal a day like the Plate Coach suggests by focusing your energy on that one time a day. Maybe it's lunch or dinner. Make sure it's a meal that you CAN be successful at most of the time and be flexible with yourself when time becomes scarce, when your energy becomes non-existent. Forgive yourself, start over, and move on.

Why not be like the deer? He or she was obviously hurt as there was a little blood and fur--but the deer managed to gallop off after initially being stunned and hurt. Sometimes we are stunned by life, our own perceived failures. Sometimes we leave a little dent,  blood and fur at the scene. Clean it off and go.

Also, if the deer can get up and gallop away from what must have been the biggest, most scary and painful disappointment ever, we can at least try.

Peace.






24 comments:

  1. Love this!!! Yes, we can't let those little obstacles or dents stand in the way of the journey to our goals! Sorry that that happened though. No fun, I had the same thing happen once and the deer ran off, I was so worried about the poor deer.

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  2. Thank you, I needed that. I was supposed to bike today but I laid in bed too long, and then it was too hot, and I didn't feel like it (insert the usual list of excuses). Tomorrow I will get back with the program!

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  3. I needed this SO MUCH today! My running is going well, that's not a new routine and it's become an essential part of my week, and I actually signed up for a 10K and got my training plan together!

    But I committed to going to the gym 3x a week, and I have been once...since Jan 1. Urgh. Start over!

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  4. Thanks for making hitting a deer relate to starting over and getting back out there! I wouldn't have thought of that but 1) can relate, 2) appreciate everyday things that relate to improving myself, and 3) am glad to hear that you and the deer are OK.

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  5. Boy, did I need this motivation. Yours story and the pic of you running in the middle of winter is what I needed. Thank you.

    Maria @ Running Minnesota
    http://maria-baer.com

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  6. Mirna, I'm watching you in Tough Mudder! You are so brave and inspiring! Thank you for your example!

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  7. wow, they say that the almighty will put things in your path that you need when you need it. I think he put tough mudder on my TV. This is not my usual programming, but was busy doing other things and let it play in the background. I heard your voice and a part of your story. You caught my attention and now here I am . Your words above were what I needed to hear. "Forgive yourself, start over, and move on." What powerful words. Thank you, tomorrow is a new day and I will begin again knowing that it is possible, it is okay to stumble but get back up. You have shown me that!

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    1. That is so sweet! Yes. You must get up. Getting up and trying again sometimes is the only option! Cheers!

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  8. "Forgive yourself, start over, and move on." Those are such powerful words that often are forgotten with the pressures we place on ourselves. Thank you for sharing your journey and your can do attitude. You have given me a renewed sense of Yes I can! Tomorrow is a new day, thank you for helping me see that. I will remember your words the next time I get lost on my journey. Thank you!

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  9. So inspired by you. Saw u on tough mudder and immediately looked up your blog. I will definitely be watching for your posts. I live very near you in north Georgia also. So excited to find your blog. Keep up the great work girl

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  10. So impressed by your example and message! Love your devotion to family.

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  11. How did you train to run. Im having troubles because its hard to breath

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  12. This post is a true inspiration! Thank God you and the deer are both alright and that you got inspired to do something good from something bad that happened. Great attitude! Keep up the good work, girl!

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    1. Thanks Renee! I was lucky it wasn't worse!

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  13. Hi Miranda, I just had a chance to listen to you on the Runners' World podcast and it was such a pleasure to get to know more about you. Your energy is amazing! I love the diversity of people who run and I hope listening to you also makes me more open minded about what the goals of runners of various sizes may be and not make incorrect assumptions. Thank you!

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    1. Thanks for your words, Ursina. I think it's good practice for everyone (including myself!) to check our assumptions from time to time. Good life skill that I myself am trying to get better at! Thanks again.

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  14. I bought clothes to my little girl today, she is 7 and came crying and saying she hates herself for being fat. I show her how much you have accomplished and your attitude towards your body. I found a video where you say " I love my body". After a while she took her clothes and went singing away. Thank you Mirna . You inspire.

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  15. Thank you for your message, Romana. I'm so happy you were able to have that conversation with your daughter. It's so important that we model healthy body image for our kids, and you did exactly that. Kudos!

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  16. Mirna, I just discovered your blog this past weekend and now I read this entry. It couldn't have come at a better moment for me. A year and a half ago, I weighed 360 pounds and made it my resolution to get healthy. I did well last year, losing 67 pounds, but then my mental roadblocks kicked in and I stalled out. In the past 3 months I have put 40 pounds back on and its so hard not to beat myself up about that. But I have been working out for the last year and a half and so I was able to do my first adventure race this past weekend! Unfortunately, my sister and I were too heavy for the canoes they provided, but we spent 3.5 hours biking and hiking and found more than enough checkpoints to get an official finish. A year ago I had to sit every 5 minutes because of back pain. All of this is to say, I needed to hear your deer story today, because I am trying to let go of hating on myself for re-gaining, recognize I am NOT back at square one, and I need to get my mind, heart and body focused on training for my first Ragnar Relay race in 20 weeks. So thank you for reminding me that I've got too much shit to do to sit around feeling sorry for myself!! Much love and respect...

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  17. You are an inspiration! I loved the article in women's running! Keep up the positive attitude!

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  18. Myrna, I just came across your blog tonight. You are absolutely out of this world wonderful. You are real and forth coming, speaking things that we all feel and experience. I appreciate you for who you are. I think it's time that you traveled and spoke to groups of women runners to motivate and inspire us. It doesn't matter what shape or size we are, we all struggle with something that you can help us with. Please start traveling and speaking and please start in San Diego, CA.

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